The Easter Story

I was sick of people saying that Easter is all about how Jesus died for our sins. they always like to point out that Easter Bunnies and chocolate eggs have nothing to do with Easter. Funny that the festival is actually named after a Pagan goddess who demanded human sacrifice. Why do they call it "Good Friday" too? What's so good about the founder of your religion being nailed up to a cross? How about "Sore Friday" or "Nail-up Friday"?

Anyway I wrote a poem called "The Easter Story" several years ago, to remind us all of the much-neglected importance of the Easter Bunny and chocolate eggs for Easter. I was going to illustrate it as a children's book. I never got around to doing it, so now I'm letting it rip in cyberspace.

The Easter Story

One day our Saviour Jesus was out Walking along when,
Some horrid bully Romans started hassling him again.
They said "You're not the son of God, we've had enough of you,
you come with us up yonder hill, we'll teach you a thing or two!"
They tied poor Jesus on to a cross and nailed him on real tight,
and Jesus said "What a stink way to spend a Friday night!"
The nails were really really sore and Jesus was feeling sad,
Then he remembered what to do and shouted out "Hey Dad!"
He cried and yelled to no avail, 'cause God was already in bed,
but a little bunny who lived nearby heard Jesus's cries instead.
He jumped up to Jesus's shoulder from the nails through Jesus's legs,
and gave our saviour fresh water to drink and fed him with hard-boiled eggs,
In the morning when God woke up he took Jesus up to the clouds,
and the bunny came too, and was given a prize, in front of and angelic crowd.
Said God "Since thou hast been such a generous bunny and relieved my poor son when in strife,
Here's a lifetimes supply of chocolate eggs, and I grant thee eternal life!"
So the bunny went back with his chocolate eggs and eternal life to the world,
and every easter he gives them out to every good boy and girl.